The ‘This is not who I am” LIE

Felicia Buitenwerf

I never saw myself as a speaker, let alone a multi-award winning one 😆. Or a trainer for that matter. The idea of doing marketing constantly tired me. Social media… I resented it. I had a lot of ‘Nah, that’s not me’s’.

I simply identified with the label ‘writer’ for a long time.

I felt safe behind my laptop, hiding from the spotlight, writing countless stories for high-end clients in business.

I was their voice; and I knew exactly how to get them the right attention from the right clients.

I unknowingly sabotaged myself – regardless of the success I had. Sure, I was on the preferred supplier list of some pretty impressive multinationals. Yes, I worked with fantastic international brands in fashion, lifestyle, food, wellness.

But the truth is, that I got comfortable.

I felt okay playing small. I settled for being their voice, rather than letting mine be heard as well. Regardless of wanting to expand into branding, I felt I wasn’t ready to brand myself.

It was not only compromising my capacities, but also my health.

I didn’t see myself as an entrepreneur who takes responsibility for scaling up, recurring income, so I kept selling my time, working crazy hours and ignoring how my arm injury was screaming at me to stop and recharge.


My flawed idea of me

Why am I sharing this?

Because I self-sabotaged by sticking to an idea of ‘me’, using words like ‘I’m a copywriter’, not realizing this very idea was limited, flawed, inaccurate and very VERY biased because my reality was exactly that: mine.


The consequence was that this influenced how I expressed myself. And how I DIDN’T express myself; I kept my mouth shut for years. It influenced how I ran my business and how I valued my work. It definitely influenced my income and it stopped me from influencing other people positively, because I didn’t market myself properly.

I changed this by working on my Personal Brand, including all the self-work that came with it. I feel more me than ever. And by trying new stuff that I think ‘isn’t me’ I often discover parts of me that I’ve hidden.

I’ve worked with highly successful entrepreneurs and entrepreneurial professionals – I’m talking professional speakers, serial entrepreneurs, premium players in their fields – who went through the same process of creating a new idea of ‘who I am’.

Mark Bryant is a Serial Entrepreneur, award-winning speaker & Creator of the Entrepreneur Success System. He said:

“Michelle has allowed me to uncover my truth and find authenticity with who and how I show up in the world. I feel so much more in flow not just in work, but in all other areas of my life as well. Thanks Michelle for finding the beauty in my soul.”

So who are you? Who do you want to be? What flavors will you show?

👉🏼Chances are you’ve created an idea of ‘who you are’ and ‘who you’re not’ too. Chances are, by now you feel comfortable with it. Chances are it stops you from reaching that next step in your career, upgrading your business, and living a fulfilled life that brings you joy, income, satisfaction.


Our current idea of who we are is a temporary perspective based on what we’ve experienced so far. But it doesn’t have to be the that way for the future.

What if you could become more you by letting go of your current idea of you…

If you want to uplevel, you need to upgrade

Let me ask you…

Are you currently fully satisfied with what you do and how you do it? If so, YAY! Well done.

But if you know there’s a next move – a promotion, a career switch, starting your own business, upleveling your visibility – then you need to rebrand yourself. YOU are the strongest asset you have in reaching your goals.

  • You need to upgrade your Personal Brand: decide what’s important for you, decide how you want to show yourself so you stand out, and get clear on what words you’ll use to position yourself online and offline.
  • Upgrading means having the courage to step out of the status quo. Really embrace those quirky parts of you and turn them into an asset.
  • You also need to upgrade your skill set and learn the basic principles of branding, so you are clear on how you want to be seen by others, and so you’ll be able to influence them.

Before I finish… I want to be clear about one thing: I’m not saying you’re not good enough and I’m definitely not endorsing a constant push-to-perform-mindset. This is a one-sided masculine mindset that might paralyze our inner feminine side and block our flow.

On the contrary. I’m talking about genuinely taking a stand for what you want based on your heart’s desire, and unapologetically putting it out there, with YOUR FLAVOR.

Let’s discover that flavor, shall we?

Much Love,

Michelle 🧡